ambassador-of-anguish: shouldertappingghosts: If I was a famous author I would publish a book with ten different endings which all went to print with varying degrees of rarity, but not tell the fans about it so that I could watch their confusion as they disagree over how the story ended. Then when they figured it out I would ‘come clean’, telling them that I had released eleven alternate...
iamtonysexual: jonandtheon: jonandtheon: jonandtheon: MY BOOK IS LOCKED IN A CLASSROOMN RED ASLERT I TOLD THIS REALLY NICE KID WHO NEVER CAUSES TROUBLE AND HEREACHED INTO HIS BACKPACK AND PULLED OUT A KEYCHAIN WITH KEYS TO THE CLASSROOM AND UNLOCKED IT FOR ME?? update i asked him why he had those keys and he said “its not important” im so lost he’ll be vital to your quest later,...
mysmorgasboard asked: desi, is indian young woman or brown person of color of south asian heritage :-)
postulation: iwilleatyourenglish: iwilleatyourenglish: once my baby was being really annoying so i put it in the basement but then i forgot and decided i didn’t want my basement anymore so i got rid of the door and then decided to do the rest later and when child protective services came they couldn’t get to my kid so they just wandered around my house i’m talking about the sims please...
Confession; 5:40 am
I love you. I hope you’re happy.
chefboyardeezie: banjo-jeff: chefboyardeezie: when im rich the first thing im doing is getting laser hair removal on every inch of my body that isn’t my head you’ll look pretty funny without eyebrows im at least 3% sure that my eyebrows r on my head
kimstar98: i hope the people who grade my essays don’t laugh at me I THOUGHT I WAS THE ONLY ONE
basedgodniall: I LITERALLY DO 8 SECONDS OF WORK THEN REWARD MYSELF WITH 40 MINUTES OF TUMBLR LIKE CAN I STOP DOING THAT
selfdoubtandsyphilis: dankestrnemes: do animals think in english or in the sounds they make this is what yahoo paid $1.1 billion for
ghosteh13: voice-of-tartarus: demeaniac: what if with our first clot of air when we are born we inhale a soul, and every time we breathe out, we squeeze a tiny part of our souls out. would our final breath actually be the very last soul fragment leaving our bodies? Woah woah wait you know those things that say “you become like the 5 people you hang out with the most” that would explain...
lucyhaele: why are tumblr people better than real life people
just-laff: egberts: if i ever met a genie i wouldnt wish for a million dollars id wish that whenever i bought something i’d always have the right amount of money to pay for it in my pocket you are one of the great thinkers of our time
pizza: rockandkrull: pizza: i don’t understand why parents say ‘i’m very disappointed in you’ like i don’t care i’m very disappointed that mcdonalds doesn’t deliver but u don’t hear me complaining about it actually in new york they deliver so whats your excuse i live in australia and im 103% sure they don’t deliver from new york to australia so whats YOUR excuse for leaving a shitty...
liar-thief-killer-creep: I can’t figure out if theyahoostaff is legit or not O.o
I think people booing Justin Bieber isn't because...
the-witchlight-stone: He’s got a while to go to get a milestone award. His songs are catchy and he has talent, but ive yet to see something breakthrough worthy of him. He’s not the first teen idol nor will he be the last. No disrespect to the Bieber fans out there. Just my lonely opinion.
Deadass. Justin over Bruno? LOST FAITH IN SOCIETY
Sometimes I really wish I hadn't been born.
likeslothstoflames: hey remember that time i got grounded because i saw my dads girlfriend in the car and then saw my dad putting the dog in the back of the car and asked why he was bringing both the dogs with us
rocketpowers: there are teenagers who have unprotected sex but have a case for their iphone just let that sink in